I want to thank Salina on a great tournament and the way it was ran. I saw a father blow up yesterday after his son lost the first place match and insted of being a good loser took his son and got upset and left. the pictures of the four places that they take only show three kids not the boy who finished second. these are not young kids, this was the fourteen year olds at 140 lbs. any dad that gets that upset should not be in wrestling or any other sport. the people at the head table said he was mad at his son and left. this action is in no means the way most people treat there kids and i hope he takes a good look how others treat there sons. If you have a coment on this please feel free to respond.

It can all be summed up in "sportsmanship", or the lack thereof. I've also seen it at baseball games. The kids can only learn bad things from bad examples. Such parents should be ashamed.

Are you sure it was because he was mad that he left. I know that we left without getting pictures taken not because anyone was upset at losing but because after spending 12 hours in place waiting for the final match and then spending 30 minutes waiting for the pictures, we decided it was not worth it and instead just went home.

Parents- boy they can be the best thing in the world and the worst thing in the world. I know that it takes parents to keeptheir kids focused and training inthe right matter but the pressures that are added to kids is huge. My father wasn't a coach and always let the coaches coach but he put pressure on me. He never felt he did but just wanted the best for me.

When parents get involved they need to be very careful. Don't always praise your kid and don't alwasy put him down-find a level spot to love your kids

My son waited for over an hour to get his picture taken. We left because the first place winner was from Oklahoma and was looking at an 8 hour ride home and the 3rd place winner was from Missouri and was looking at a 6 hour ride home. We didn't even line up until 7:00. When they decided to leave, we decided to leave. If they had wanted to stay, we would probably have toughed it out and stayed too.

well i started this letter about kids and there dads and we were lucky that the 140lb 14 and under was over about 4, when we walked in to have the pictures taken there was no wait, the boys were told to get on the stand and the pictures were taken. so the idea of the long wait where the dad took the boy and walked out does not hold true in this case. i,am only talking about the 14 year old not every weight and age. I will say that there were eight kids in the 140 14 and under and there were six boys that would have loved to have been in the second place and they would have stayed. thanks for a great day in Salina and i just wish that we could come back next year but my grandson will be in hi school.

thats stupid.
my dad has always been there for me after i get off the mat. win or lose. wrestling should be fun. if ur gonna get angry do it where noone can see

i started this last week about a father that took his son home after he was baeten at salina for first and some of you though that he did not want to stand in line for pictures. well today at marysville after this boy from vermillion vally lost his first match his dad got mad at him and the reff and did the same thing, took his son and left. how can a dad say he wants his son to be a good wrestler and do things like this. this boy is 14 and at 140 need to say dad let me be a wrestler not a baby like you are making me.

Yes, it is very sad. Yes, it does happen very often. And yes, it happens in all the sports.

Worse yet, we constantly blame today's kids for acting more "privelaged" than we "adults" did when we were kids, while kids today's witness a growing contradiction of behaviors...I see more and more poor sportsmanship by "the adults"...at and away from tournaments, in all sports.

Coach-to-coach bitterness that leads to foul exchanges and even worse gossip.

Coach-to-ref throwing things in frustration.

Ref-to-coach power plays of insults and taunts.

Parent-to-parent intolerance and inconsideration.

And the coupe de grat...

Club-to-club or school-to-school senseless aggitation.

A kid finally starts to understand "sportsmanship" and "work ethic", and then a coach says something intentionally inflamitory about the wrestling academies the kid attends outside of the club.

Go figure..."How in the world could they be so spoiled?"

What do you think of this situation?

My child wrestled this weekend at Valley Center. His first match was a very close one, could have gone either way. My child ended up pinning his opponent, third period. When the kid got up, he pulled his ankle band off and threw it on the mat. Then the official told them to shake hands and he slapped my son's hand. At that point this kids coach came onto the mat, grabbed this kid, made him pick up the band and place it on the mat nicely (the entire time yelling at him). At this point, my son is quit intimidated and our coach motioned for him to go ahead and leave. He started to leave and this coach grabbed my child and forced the other kid to shake his hand. The two boys then left the mat and that coach continued to yell at him, even threw his clothes at him.

I was uneasy about my child being out there involved in the situation but, angry that he laid a hand on my child. But, the person I was most concerned about was the other child! I did notice, that coach did not coach him the rest of the day. This child did not win a single match at this tourny, nor did he place. I do know that this child placed top 4 at Salina TOC.
Who's teaching who here? And if it was sportsmanship this coach was trying to teach, his approach was unacceptable! He's just lucky I didn't run out on the mat and get in his face for touching my child!

I too am very confused by, and frustrated with, this issue. I am working with my forth and youngest son, at 13 years old, and adults seem to be getting younger not wiser.

A. The kid did need to be disciplined.

B. I want to believe the coach had good intentions...but he went about it all wrong.

C. Glad you didn't run out...cause then you may have reinforced the same bad lesson. You restraint shows more maturity on your part.

Oh yes, I think there is cause for alarm. I have also experienced similar dramas in kids wrestling and football. Even in my own son's wrestling club. Those experiences have made me even more committed to the kids, but very cautious as well...

After coaching football (Grades 1-6) for five years, I've learned that wrestling is no worse than others. That said, it is a very scary trend that we are witnessing.

Too many adults are involved for the wrong reasons, or with unabashed ignorance. We are seeing more of these incidents esculate. We need to all speak more about these bad influences that are disquised as guidance.

However, I warn, step firmly, but cautiosly. Be ready for drama when you act.

Coaching football, it took me a while, but eventually I began to voice my distain for poor coaching by my peers. And when I did, it caused some real subversive drama.

One day, I was told by a screaming head coach to get off the field if I could not support his decisions on his team. Which I did, calmly and politely, in front of gasping parents and kids.

Nearly all of the kids and parents later apologized for the way I was treated "for voicing their concerns". YET, only a couple parents acted by taking it back to the coaches. The air is still thick, after two years.

...thus, I am more selective of my battles.

A. The coach needed to express his disappointment, not his anger.

B. Coaching is more about exemplary guidance than dominant control, especially with kids. The sport has to be for the kid-athlete, not the adult or coach.

C. To calm the situation and leverage your skills, you might have stepped in and expressed your appreciation for the coach trying to correct the situation. Then took your sons hand and offered it out, while sharing your thoughts about good sportmanship and behaving in a way that would be disappointing to his mom.

What your son experienced, though unsettling, was probably a blessing in disguise. He won't soon forget and he's seen what not to do. Plus, kids are resilient and now he can appreciate real coaching, having seen the "less-than-appropriate".

I'm just glad there are some really great coaches, and a lot of good coaches, out there. I try to find them for my son, and I'm committed to supporting them even through the tough times.

Unfortuanatly in the midst of trying to teach sportsmanship to their kids, some coaches step over the bounds and themselves become a bad example of the very thing they are trying to avoid.

Coaches touch our children all the time. If we are not at every practice and see every game/match we have no idea what goes on. In public when our children are touched THEN we have a chance to respond. I don't believe this coach meant to harm your child but rather teach who he was coaching a lesson . As parents we allow our children to participate in all kind of sports. What comes with that is someone having a huge influence over our child's life. If we, as parents, have a problem with it then we need to approach that coach with respect. It is very simple...just tell the coach or person you have a problem with in private you did not appreciate what went on. AND be careful, we as parents put our children on display and just because what goes on is not to OUR liking...ask the child how THEY felt. You could gain incredible insight.