purlers room is not a normal club practice room. This is a room full of kids that already know a ton about the sport. We are tallking about a room with 20% good kids 30% avrage kids and the reast novice kids.My numbers may not be exact numbers.This was just to use as a piont.I would love to see 1 man teach 20 new kids alone.It would be very hard even for the best coaches.

I don't see a problem with allowing parents in the room during practice as long as they don't become a distraction. I would guess that most clubs would welcome the help of parents who would like to contribute in practices, especially if they had a lot of inexperienced wrestlers in the room. I will say that a parent who comes on the mat and spends their time primarily helping their own child is not what the club needs. If you step on the mat to help out in practice, you should be willing to help out any kid in the room. As a parent/coach for nine years, having my son compete in Junior High and now in his freshman year of High School, these last three years have been my favorite. Being able to step away from the mat and just be dad is great.

My gut tells me if all clubs went to closed practices we would have far fewer kids wrestling in a very short time. I know I wouldn't allow my child to be involved in a youth sport where the practices are closed. Are there distractions and a few valid reasons for closed practices, sure! But you deal with those individually and keep the room open for the betterment of the club and the sport.

So I ask the question...
When you allow these parents into the room, on to the mat, and coaching other kids, do you require them to have a coaches card and Back Ground Check?
My gut is telling me NO!
We have an open room but all parents that decide to help are required to go through that process.
Maybe clubs are just trying to follow the rules that says all coaches must have a card and the best way to limit their liability is a closed practice room.
Just sharing another point of view!

Coaches card and back ground check. When I was in college, before I was married and long before I had kids of my own, I spent three Kids' seasons as a volunteer coach for the local club. I did it because I loved the sport, and I wanted to help young kids learn and love the sport. No back ground check was required, and no Bronze card was required to coach all the way through the end of the season.

Granted that was in the late '80s, and times have changed since then. We now live in a sterilized society because there are bad apples among us, and by not protecting ourselves (liability wise), we create these defensive barriers so we don't get sued. It is unfortunate that we have to defend ourselves because of a few, or many, bad apples.

I'd have to concur with both Redeployed and Sportsfan, parents need to be in the room at kids level. Every club I've been involved with encouraged it. In fact I'd have to say the biggest factor for success for most kids, is the support of their parents. I know as a club director I hated it when some parents treated weekly practices as day care and just dropped their kids off.

I've seen Darin Denning, long time coach of Kaw Valley and helper to Sunflower, direct a room of 20 PLUS new kids and still keep control of the room. Darin had expectations for his wrestlers, and parents, and didn't let them slide.

Tony Purler's room isn't filled with kids that know everything, it's filled with kids that know what is expected of them, as well as their parents. He makes the rules clear. The parents must let him coach, and the kids must focus on what he's teaching. No distractions or those making them.

Cutting the parents out of the room, at a young age, I think in the end will hurt the club. You'll get your 2 hours time with them as a coach, but your also robbing the parents and wrestlers of sharing in your knowledge, and allowing them to connect and both wanting to excel in wrestling, one as a wrestler and the other as a wrestling parent.

I've learned tons from just sitting, watching, and listening to guys like Darin Denning and Tony Purler, just to name a few coaches who have impacted my son, and me as well.

Thanks for all your replies. I'm glad to see I'm not crazy in my thinking. I feel parents in the room makes smarter parents which in turn helps the kids. Thanks again for letting me know how you all feel about it.

I would never allow my son in a closed practice. First of all if they don't want parents there then I believe they are hiding something. I understand some wrestling rooms are small and that can factor in to it, but parents should still be allowed to at least check things out. My son practices 2 hours/2 times a week and barely gets 5 minutes total of coaching help. We are not allowed to help at all. Of course there are a few parents that don't follow the rules!!! I am a mother and would have no problem helping kids. I would even get a coaching card and go through a background check! Part of the problem with this team is that all the coaches that have sons on the team mostly focus on their own kids. I think if you are coaching you should have to coach them all, at practice and tournaments.

people who think that coaches are "hiding" something are acting a little childish. We have had closed practices in the past, then we went away from it for about 6 years. We closed practices again this year. It's all how you approach things. In my opinion if a parent wants to go through the background check and the bronze certification, then they should be allowed to become a coach, they should not be allowed to coach their own kid. Too many dads who "wrestled" want to be there to push their own kid too far, and have NO interest in the other kids in the club. CBR, SEK, be truthful and ask yourself this question, are you in it for the club, or are you in it for YOUR SON! Also realize that to learn the sport of wrestling it takes time, just because you go to more practices, or try to learn more moves, doesn't mean that your son or daughter will have earlier success. for now let the coaches do their job, and be a parent, sit back and enjoy the victories. remeber that wrestling teaches us that some victories are very small and that most don't have medals attached. if you want to teach at home there are hundreds of videos on youtube, watch together and learn. good luck to all.

I'm sorry that they had closed practices in the past. For the past three years we have not so that's all I have known. I'm not trying to live my past through my kid by any means cause I never wrestled, my school did not offer it. We were not asked or warned before we signed up and paid our money for the club. We were just told that practices were gonna be closed. So with that being said, I can tell you just because someone wrestled for years and learned all there was about wrestling, it does not make them a coach by any means. It takes a lot more than just being a past wrestler to be a coach. I can tell you that first hand with what I have seen in my short three years in the sport. There are coaches I have seen at tournaments that have no right to be telling a kid what to do. I am not expert at each sport by no means, nobody is, but I do consider myself a coach. It takes compassion, leadership, a general knowledge of the sport, and much more. I never once said our coaches were hiding anything, I never thought that for one second. I just know, that when my kids hits the mat, he looks at me, I look at him, we nod our heads and he wrestles. He knows what he needs to do and doesn't need me yelling at him to get up, get off his back, don't reach back, etc. I'll also be the first one to ask one of our coaches to sit beside me in the corner. I have never told any of our coaches to move so I could coach my kid. But I do wanna be there mat side when he wrestles. If I'm wrong, than maybe I'm just always gonna be wrong.

I disagree w/ closed practices and find it hard to believe that any parent w/ good sense would subject their 15U child to that. Once you get into HS then no biggy but younger children should have their parents involved and observing.

You know just because someone is a coach doesn't mean they are the end all be all. I've been around a lot of coaches in different sports that are all about stroking their own ego or are on power trips and not about the athletes welfare or needs. Not all coaches have the background or experience to be coaches. I do acknowledge that there are great coaches who know what balance is and are able to meet those demands. But it is rarer than one would think.

Some schools actually hire teachers on staff who have never wrestled a day in their life to coach their teams. Then you have adults who don't know how to deal with kids let alone groups of them. Coaches who play favorites, manipulative, vulgar, personal lives are screwed up and lastly coaches who are not flexible in their programs enough to differentiate between a 6U 45lber and 14U HWT. So to me having a closed practice looks real suspicious. In my opinion they either have something to hide or don't want to have anyone ask questions about what they are doing.

Consider this. Having had a law enforcement background myself. I know that if someone is a drug addict, alcoholic, child molester or any other type of criminal that it doesn't show up on a background check unless they have been caught in the past. Statistics prove that we only catch a very small percentage of these type of people and some go their whole lives without ever getting caught at all. It isn't like we subject coaches, refs or other officials to random drug screening or psychological examinations to see if they are fit to do the job. Most of this based on trust and volunteers. To me if you shut the door on people then you take away some of that trust as well.

the main reason for closing the doors at our club, in the past was noise control. we had 60 parents, younger syblings etc. in the room. 60+ people + idle chit chat = a noise level that coaches cannot compete with. children are easily distracted, i have done this for a lot of years and believe that the less distraction the better. i do believe that a father who is willing to come in and learn is ok, but they will help and will not be aloud to coach their own child. show that you have interest in the building of a club, ok. interest in making darn sure that your kid gets more 1-on-1 attention than other children sorry i won't go for it.

i agree that some coaches can't handle large groups of youngsters, and some coaches may be bad people, but that certainly doesn't mean that ALL PARENTS ARE GOOD. being from law enforcement HOSSUS you should know that better than anyone.

the coaches at our club can handle large groups. i personally think that things could be done a little differently, but it seems to be working. it's good to hear different points of view.

i also know that in the past few years parents in our club have asked for change. now they have it. it's very early in the season, let's wait until the end of the season to measure the success. good luck.

I just had a coach violently attack my son from behind recently for no apparent reason other than he just got mad at him even though he was doing what he was supposed to do. I was there and witnessed it. So right now my confidence in coaching is not at an all time high. Suffice to say there are a lot of good people who make bad choices and that there will always be that to deal with.

Good luck with your closed door policy, just know that I would never allow it for me and mine.

that is ridiculous, did you press charges?

No, I didn't. I chose restraint and the proverbial high road. Last practice of the season and I didn't want to mess up my sons football season as well as the rest of the teams. Had my son been injured from it I might have gone down a different path. I just figured that the kids didn't need to see two adults get hauled off to jail. I lectured the guy after practice and told him would not get a second chance with my kid or anyone else's.

glad you didn't go off on him. you are right that looks very bad to the kids. that's too bad i hope your kid is OK. i talked to my cousin his son played football for a coach who put up 72 points on a team in the first half!!!when challenged about leaving the starters in for the second half he went ballistic and got thrown out of the game. some guys probably regret what they do immediately others have no shame.

I thought about this a lot over the weekend. This does not seem to be the case at our club. I know there are 4 of our coaches who have kids in our club and I know at least 3 of the 4 coaches are in their kids corner every time their kid wrestles...

I see pros and cons both ways. Our practices were closed last year and here are the few of the reasons we decided to do so.

1) Parent need to be parent and encourage the efforts of their kids. There are coaches there to push them and try to keep their focus. Parents yelling from the sidelines at their kids during conditioning and live wrestling was at time detrimental to the kids.

2) Conflict with parent vs parent during live drills.

3) Parents contiually coming on the mat trying to coach without going through the coaching registration process.

Now after all that last year, this we look back at what transpired and realized alot of what is already stated. Parent being able to help with the moves taught at home, security of smaller kids having their parents there and our ability to control what happens in our room.

We opened practices back up and have decided to handle these issue with each individual cases.

I felt we punished all the parent by the action of a few parents.

Years past we were loose with our club handbook which lays out that the earlier mentioned actions will not be tolerated. Instead of dealing with the probelms we just covered them up by not allowing any.

It is our full expectation that the parent all will follow what we layed out in the club handbook or they will be dealt with individually.

We also offered to anyone no matter what skill level to become coaches, but most are reluctant once we tell them that we expect them to coach all the club not just their own child.

As far as coaches like Purler, I have been to a few of his two days clinics and there are all mixes of skills level and age groups. He handles a room like no one I have ever seen and keep as much control and focus than I ever realized could be possible. I try to copy what he does in his room.

i was referring to practices, i have a problem with "dad/coach" who is only in it for 1 kid. in my opinion, that's not coaching at all.

the first paragraph is exactly what would happen with most of our dad/coaches. the second paragraph brings up another point that i made earlier. if you want to help at home, get some videos. Tony Purler and his foundation coaching technique is great for kids, ALL LEVELS.